And Pilates

Well not really Pilates. Pre-pilates. But I put a DVD into the machine and tried to do it. (I've had these DVDs for two years but never put them in a machine.) And I hated hated hated it. After ten minutes I took it out.

Then the victory. I put the other one in. No, I didn't get pissed off. I didn't decide that Pilates is doomed or filled with bad karma. I put the other one in the damn machine. Now I admit that I wasn't feeling too hopeful. And that woman on the first one put me off like crazy. But the second one, Pilates for Inflexible People, had a nice menu and a lovely woman -- named Maggie -- who didn't piss me off. I did "pre-pilates," breathing, slow awareness of the core, and some yoga-like exercises for 15 minutes. Amazing really.

I even got the notion that I ought to rearrange my space so I have room to completely roll out a yoga mat and be able to move without breaking any body part. Most of me is ashamed that I am in such bad shape, that 15 minutes was so hard, and that I didn't do more. But a tiny part says "Yay me!" I'm trying to remember what Jenette told me while reading her archives about having compassion for my younger self. (She thought she was telling herself, but she was really telling me.)

So I have another growth opportunity -- being compassionate to my younger self. And being compassionate toward my present self. This year is just filled with them so far.
Thank you Jennette.